Hey guys. Time for a long blog post so get ready to read as this one is important.

Hiveworks had 852 submissions and in the end only 21 were hired. I was not one of these few and I didn’t make it to the final round of judging apparently, so And Once Again will not be published by Hiveworks. How does this make me feel? Upset, yes, but also relieved. I am just glad it’s over with. It was very, VERY stressful waiting every day to hear something that would affect my life to the degree it would have.

I was hoping to get into Hiveworks and start to be in a decent financial situation compared to now, but that’s not going to happen. I’m certainly not upset AT Hiveworks, reducing 852 all the way down to 21 is insane. I had a 2% chance of getting in when you look at things mathematically. That wasn’t ever very stellar.

What upsets me is that they said that they were going to contact people as the month went on with their losers email, meaning that it sounded like “the longer it takes to hear from us, the better your chances are looking.” So as the time went by and by, I started to get really optimistic about it. Only for them to suddenly say they haven’t sent out any emails at all and that judging was taking longer than usual. That was not reassuring and sent me into some pretty deep anxiety because suddenly I felt ‘oh hey they haven’t contacted me, I might actually get in’ only for it to all crash down. That was really shitty feeling if you excuse the profanity. I’m sure it wasn’t their intention, but I just felt there could have been a lot better communication between the people submitting and the staff. I had to stake out the CEO’s twitter like 20 times a day just to see if there was any Hiveworks news.

So what does this mean for And Once Again? Nothing. Nothing is changing. I’m obviously going to keep working on my passion project same as before. What IS changing is I’m going to be working a lot harder to improve my skills and the number of people my work reaches. I plan to be very active on social media so I can start reaching a wider audience and create a fandom about my work. I need to start bringing this to more and more people so that they can support me as this goes on. It’s not impossible, but it’s going to be a slog. I’m just thankful that I’m not alone with this and have a very understanding lover. I’m just upset that this didn’t go through because it would have let me go and be more independent.

I’m upset, but it’s a relief that it’s finally over. I’m not angry and I respect the judgments that were made, and I can’t help how I feel over it. But I will forge my own destiny and carve a niche out for myself.

Please help any way you feel like, whether it be supporting me on Patreon (you should think about doing that honestly, I’m adding a lot more content there and using my updates as a psuedo-blog where you can see what’s going on in my mind when I upload stuff), following me on social media or making fanart of And Once Again.